The hole in my bagel helped me see right into the situation. Less poetically but just as realistically my bagel reminded me of some really important things. See here’s the thing, I haven’t had a bagel in years. It’s not because I don’t love them. As a little girl I can still remember begging my mom to go watch the cake lady decorate her cakes in swirls of frosting when we were by that part of the store. Then upon completion of my moms grocery shopping and my talking the ear off the cake lady I could choose a bagel. My bagel of choice was usually the blueberry one. Since those days though I don’t remember having may of those delightful rounds. Somehow my body decided it didn’t like wheat….and a host of other food too.
Here is “the list”: No wheat, cow dairy (hallelujah I can still have butter though!), soy, sea food, most sugars, nuts (I can die from them…), peas, lentils, and some beans.
Because I’ve had to eat a certain way for so long it doesn’t really phase me anymore. I love watching other people enjoy foods I can’t. Every once in a while, like when I ate this bagel, I’m amazed at some simple things. There’s the fact that I not only live in a country where I can find food that I need but that I live in a city that is all about gluten free this and sugar free that. I’m wasn’t born in India where my kiddos are and I’m pretty sure part of that is because God knew my body was going to be weaker. That’s down right humbling and amazing.
Because everyone’s lives revolve around food in some way it can be a very unique thing to have to eliminate certain ones. Some days it makes me feel like a huge inconvenience. Going to people’s houses for dinner becomes complicated and I feel terrible having to bother anyone. (For the record I actually can eat quite a bit and do. And I’m happy to bring my own food wherever I go!) Eating out is always an adventure and I swear that there are some sweet waiters who must think I’m so picky but kindly oblige my strange requests.
I don’t feel sorry that I can’t eat certain things. At this point it is a lifestyle (that I have to adhere to) and so it’s not a big deal. It’s just life.
This was illustrated when I read a beautiful verse that spoke to my hungry heart. “Oh taste and see that the Lord is good!” Taste!!! While a few foods this side of heaven are off limits for now the best thing is not. In fact I’m encouraged to try and test the flavors and quality of Jesus. He is never off limits to me. I can chew on his words and lick my tongue over his sweet promises. My face can pucker at the things I don’t understand, the things that seem sour. I can sink my teeth into meaty passages. This is grace. Jesus denied himself and came down to earth so that I might taste the most magnificent thing there is to taste. I will savor it.
When there are days it is hard to deal with food I can smile because I know that the marriage feast of the Lamb promised in heaven is going to be that much more amazing. Meanwhile I’ll be tasting the goodness of my God and enjoying my gluten free, sugar free bagel. It’s a gift.